Where's Daddy?

Christmas '08

Paul travels a decent amount with work, but this is by far the hardest time for Judah.
Every morning when he wakes up the first thing he says is;
"Where's Daddy?"
When he gets up from his nap he races to the front window and looks for Paul's car and again asks;
"Where's Daddy?"

Trying to explain to a not-yet-two-year old that his daddy is working but will be home in another week isn't so easy. Paul sends movies of himself to us for Judah to watch and Judah will sit and watch the thirty second clip over and over and over again - finding great delight each time in watching "DADDY!"

"Daddy" and "Dadda" are like chants around here. Judah goes around the house saying both over and over. Every now and then I hear him say "Uh oh! No Dadda." And sometimes he will grab my hand and pull at me with great desperation and say "See daddy?"
I get asked the "Where's Daddy?" question about fifty times a day. No joke.

It breaks my heart.
I miss Paul, but it is way, way harder to see our son miss his daddy.
Logic and reasoning are lost on him.
When I tell him daddy misses him/loves him/sent kisses for him he jumps up and starts looking for his daddy.
Any sort of count down system (to the day Paul gets back) is simply too advanced for him yet (and at this point I'm not exactly sure which day he'll be home anyway!)

I have been impressed with Judah's behavior. A lot of times when Paul goes away Judah tries to challenge me and push the limits. This time, even though I can tell he is noticing Paul's absence more than ever before, he is behaving really well and hasn't acted out at all.

I have tried hard to give him a predictable schedule and routine, while also giving him the opportunity to get out of the house a lot to play outdoors and with friends.
It has kept me busy and I am enjoying him a lot. But we both miss Paul. Alot. And are ready for him to come home to us!


moredayslikethisplease said...

Awww! I can just here his little voice looking for Daddy! Have faith that as he gets older, while I'm sure it won't be easier - at least he'll be able to more easily understand!

I've used backward paper chains with my kiddos when they were younger - and although Judah's still kinda young for it. With those if you had to you could always cut more then one if Paul ends up coming home before he is scheduled to or even add a couple links if his trip gets extended.

Here's praying that "daddy" gets home sooner then expected!

Anonymous said...

i understand what your going thru! altough rob is home every night... with his back and forth work schedule jack has a hard time with it too! one week he wakes up and daddy is there and then the same day he wakes up from a nap and daddy is gone. and the opposite the next week! and every time jack says "daddy at work?!". and jack also acts out... he is kinda ocd! and with one thing ( rob working) already changing all the time anything that changes next will set him off! i couldnt imagine rob being gone from us for more then the hours he is at work! you and your boys are sooo strong! i hope paul gets home to his loving family soon! -ashleigh

BeckeyZ said...

It IS harder for the kids. Ronnie drives a truck, and for the most part is home on a fairly regular basis, but there are still many nights when he is not here and the kids squeal with delight when he gets home.

Julie said...

It is so hard. When Rob got deployed Zion looked for him for days. She kept going to the front door and window and looking out and asking for him. It broke my heart. What's sadder is that she doesn't look for him now. A relief but still sad.

Bethany said...


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